The Story of a Second

I close my eyes for a split second. In the darkness I can already hear the roar of the blood pushing upwards, towards my temples. It’s like the space within is getting smaller and smaller, it’s like part of me is succumbing into blackness and part of me is becoming more and more distant.

I open my eyes. I want to hear but there’s a thick fog around that blocks sight and hearing. I try to focus. My head hurts. I try to get the stream of thoughts and fears inline. Try to get myself back there. But somehow during the split second my being has parted from myself and I end up hanging in the distance, striving to regain control.

I close my eyes again. “Regain the balance!” “Shush the thunder drum in the temples!” “Get back, get back!” The more I try, the less I succeed. The more I fight it the more it takes over me. “Grab onto something!” I say to myself. But reality seems to be slipping and darkness and distance envelop.

I open my eyes. My hands are cold. Inside, a monstrous iceberg just sank the heat of my soul. I search myself… The fight seems to be over. I tend to rejoice. And then I refrain. The core of me is half melted and half stoned.

I linger. Between the burning ashes and the icy cold. Still alive though. A tiny teardrop makes its way from the corner of my eye, slowly downwards.

Disclaimer: all is well, we just strangely choose to ride the storms at times...